Top
Tacky Treasures
The Mark Eden Bust Developer, the Popener, a rubber band
vest, and more
Nouveau Tacky
Jesus playing football, a Chairman Mao cigarette lighter,
and other delightfully tasteless objects
Tacky Places
Foamhenge, Cooter's Place, Planet Wayside,
and other whimsical places
Tacky Topics
The Tacky Treasures Road Show, Mike the Headless Chicken,
big heads, art cars, salt & pepper shakers, ballerinas abuse
Seasonal Tacky
Naked witch earrings, Love Kubes™, kinky cuffs,
pooping reindeer, Santa piñata, and other holiday treats
Books & Records
Why not eat insects, the Temple City Kazoo
Orchestra, and more
Tacky Links |
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Coal Country Miniature
Golf
Learn about the coal mining industry, and have fun playing
miniature golf at the same time! The hazards for the course
were created from equipment used in coal mining, including
drills for cutting into coal seams, ventilation fans, and
various methods for shoring up the ceilings. Central to the
course is an approximately 30-foot metal statue of a coal
miner ("Big John") who is constantly rotating. On
the seventh hole, you need to putt between his feet as they
go around.
We visited this mini-golf course in Fairmont, West Virginia
on August 24, 2008. It was surprisingly well kept up. The
"greens" were in good condition, and all the hazards
and trick lies worked as they were supposed to. It was a pleasant
way to spend an hour in the sun. The only downside is that
there aren't a lot of other attractions in the area. But if
you happen to be passing through Fairmont on I-79, just take
the Rte. 310 exit away from downtown, and turn at the second
left onto Hopewell Road. You can't miss it, or "Big John."
Thanks to Bob Smakula, for the tip.
More information at http://www.coalcountrywv.com/.
More
photos on my Flickr site.
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Big John, at
Coal Country Miniature Golf
Fairmont, West Virginia
Bob putts through a cutting drum
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Silly Things for
Silly People
This weekend, I discovered a new store which stocks some
amazingly tacky things. I couldn’t fully investigate
it at the time, because I had my mother with me at the time
(she stayed on the first floor, which is billed as “family
friendly”). But based on the George W. Bush toilet paper
and the Sacred Heart of Elvis refrigerator magnets, I know
I have to go back. If you haven’t found your entry for
the Tacky Treasures Road Show, it might be worth your while
checking out CineGraphic Studios in Frederick, Maryland. After
all, their slogan is “Silly Things for Silly People.”
If you can’t make it out to Frederick, they have an
online store. However, it does not have the variety of the
bricks and mortar store.
http://www.cinegraphicstudios.com/
The books department alone is work the trip. Here are the
two books I bought in my abbreviated visit:
- The Big Book of Irony by John Winokur. Actually, in physical
dimensions, it’s small. Ooooh! What irony!
- Suburban Legends: True Tales of Murder, Mayhem, and Minivans
by Sam Stall
There is a limit of two entries per person in the Tacky Treasures
Road Show. Choose wisely! And if you can’t find anything
at all, just remember that it might qualify you to be a judge. |
Sacred Heart of Elvis
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The Clog Palace
http://www.clogpalace.com/
To explain what the Clog Palace was, I am going to ask that you
form two separate pictures in your mind.
First, imagine a rural mountain community, where local musicians
picked up fiddle, banjo, and guitar, and play string band music
to which their friends can dance. This might happen in a church
hall, a barn, a small restaurant, or even on someone's front porch.
The lively dance music inspires the dancers to beat out a rhythm
with their feet. They might call it clogging, or buckdancing, or
flatfooting. They might look at you funny for thinking it needs
a special name; “it's just dancing.”
Second, picture an aging seafood restaurant just outside of the
big city of D.C. There are murals of ships and sea captains, and
the lyrics to “Blow the Man Down” on the wall. But there is also
a large print of three faces of Elvis Presley, and dozens of old
movie advertisements lined up just below the wooden wainscoting.
There's an area for dancing in the center of the room, and a revolving
disco ball hovers over the entire scene. When the multicolored lights
are shone upon it, dots twirl around the room. The food is so-so,
the waitresses surly and sometimes tattooed, and the crowd at the
bar in the back is a little bit scary. The bathrooms are so small
there's a common sink for men and women. They don't look like they've
been cleaned in a while.
Now, if your mind can tolerate it, superimpose picture number one
on top of picture number two, and you have the beginning of an idea
of what the World Famous Captain White's Oyster Bar and Clog Palace
was like. But only a beginning; there's more to tell, and that's
what I want to do, through pictures, mementos, but most importantly
through the stories of people who were there. For more information,
go to: http://www.clogpalace.com/
Planet Wayside
I am sorry to say that one of my first designated Tacky Treasure
Places is no more. The quirky establishment known as Planet
Wayside closed forever in 2006, and the building was razed.
A new building has risen in its place, housing Lowry's Crab
Shack. It's sad to lose a place with such character, but at
least the replacement is an equally beloved local business,
which I visited on March 15, 2008.
>> Read
the full article << |
Planet Wayside
Hamilton, Virginia
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Enchanted Forest
 Enchanted
Forest in Ellicott City, Maryland was a much-beloved amusement park
that opened in 1955, and closed in 1989. It was a storybook park,
and when it first opened, there were no mechanical rides. Kids walked
through the park and saw characters from their favorite nursery
rhymes and let their imaginations go wild.
>> Read the full
article <<
Casa Grande Trading
Post & Turquoise Mining Museum
Cerrillos, New Mexico
What do John Wayne, the B-2 Stealth Bomber, and a four-legged
deer lamp have to do with the history of turquoise mining?
Bob and I were wondering the same thing. At least this museum
had a diorama to die for.
>> Read
the full article << |
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Tiny Town / BoneZone
Near Cerrillos, New Mexico is a crazily wonderful little
folk environment called Tiny Town, also known as the BoneZone.
The ostensible mayor of Tiny Town is Tammy "Tatt2 Tammy"
Lange, a former tattoo artist.
>> Read
the full article << |
No Bitching
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Monster Mountain
Museum
This is a site we passed on the way to Capitol Reef National
Park. Dozens of metal sculptures surround the abandoned Desert
Inn Motel in Hanksville, Utah. This is called the Monster
Mountain Museum. It looks abandoned, too. However, there was
plenty to photograph, and these are just the highlights.
>> Read
the full article << |
Banjosauricus?
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Florida House
Florida House itself is not tacky, but what it has displayed
in its garden is.
>> Read
the full article << |
Sculpture by Romero Britto
Florida House
2nd & East Capitol NE
Washington DC
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Foamhenge
Rockbridge County may have lost its Big
Heads, but it now has its own full-sized replica of Stonehenge,
right in the heart of the Blue Ridge Mountains, and made completely
of foam.
>> Read
the full article << |
Foamhenge
Route 11, Natural Bridge, Virginia
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Professor Cline's
Haunted Monster Museum
I visited this haunted house twice, once in September 2003,
and again in April 2004. It just gets better every time. If
you dare enter through the forbidding-looking gate, you will
have to walk about an eighth of a mile up hill through an
overgrown forest trail. Along the way, there are sinister
signs that something is not quite right here.
>> Read
the full article << |
Entrance to the
Haunted Monster Museum
Natural Bridge, Virginia
September 20, 2003
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Cooter's Place
Alas, Cooter's in Sperryville is no more. These pictures
and notes are from my last visit, and I am posting them today
in honor of Ben "Cooter" Jones' apparent
endorsement of John Kerry for President in the Washington
Post.
Once the D.C. area mecca for Dukes of Hazzard fans, Cooter's
Place in Sperryville, Virginia, closed at the end of November
2003, a victim of its own success. Ben "Cooter"
Jones could barely keep up with the demand for photo opportunities
and rides in the General Lee...
>> Read
the full article << |
The General Robert
E. Lee
Photographed at Cooter's
Place
Sperryville, Virginia
June 2003
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The American Dime
Museum
In 1999, the American Dime Museum opened in Baltimore, Maryland.
Sadly, in late 2006, it closed. On February 26, 2007, the
remaining contents of the museum were auctioned off. I feel
like this is a personal loss. Where else could I indulge my
fondness for the weird and tasteless than a museum devoted
to sideshow chicanery? And where will I go now?
>> Read the
full article << |
Sideshow banner advertising
Ferdinand, the two-headed bull
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Mt.
Rainier Antique, Thrift and Salvage
I can't think of a more entertaining way to spend a Saturday
afternoon than rummaging around my favorite antique store,
listening to Bob Dylan or NPR and discussing current affairs
with owner Stuart Morris. Mt. Rainier, Maryland, is fortunate
to have what I consider to be the best second-hand store in
the region.
>> Read
the full article << |
Stuart Morris in front of his store
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The Miracle on
34th Street
You stroll down Chestnut Avenue, and take a left on 34th
Street, and suddenly evening turns to almost day. The houses
are lit, and the street is bustling with people. Maybe it's
tacky, but you have to admire the spirit of the folks on 34th
Street, who have been doing this for years. Everyone should
see this at least once.
>> Read
the full article << |
34th Street, Hampden
Baltimore, Maryland
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The
Little Grill
Cruising down Skyline Drive to admire the fall profusion
of colors? Leaf watchers who don't mind going a little out
of the way can head west on Route 33 out of Shenandoah National
Park and into Harrisonburg, Virginia. A couple of miles beyond
the I-81 junction, past the usual fast food suspects, one
can enjoy a healthful, hearty meal at the Little Grill. Located
at 621 N. Main Street (hang a right at Courthouse Square in
the center of town), the Little Grill has a plain store front
with patchwork curtains as rustic as the rural landscape that
surrounds this growing college town.
The building has been operated as a restaurant since 1930,
and some of the decor appears to date from that time. Cast-offs
from other generations ornament the enormous built-in shelves
that fill the rear wall: an old bicycle, a single crutch,
a mannequin's head, a broken tube radio, a rusted "Muppet
Show" lunch box, and books -- perhaps abandoned by college
students of days gone by. Of particular interest is a seminal
work on relationships written by actress Susan Dey in her
Partridge Family days. Over the years, patrons of the Little
Grill have helpfully highlighted the more humorous advice
aimed at teenage girls whose sole objective in life appeared
to be "getting boys."
Proprieters Ron and Melanie Copeland serve up a mostly vegetarian,
mostly Mexican-style cuisine at an affordable price that draws
in students from James Madison University. At $4.50, "Ron's
Mexi Plate" is a tasty bargain: a bean burrito in a freshly
made tortilla, fried potatoes rolled up in a corn tortilla,
Spanish rice and refried beans, topped with guacamole, sour
cream and picante sauce. Other entrees feature stir-fried
vegetables, pasta with sauteed vegetables, and falafel. The
sandwich selection includes burgers (both veggie and the regular
kind), turkey, ham, cheese, and even a BLT. Few items on the
menu (not even the imported beers) exceed the price of $5.00,
and the size of the portions reflect the generosity of the
owners. Every Monday at noon, they transform the Little Grill
into a soup kitchen, proclaiming "free food for anyone in
the world." So, it's 25 miles from the national park. How
many leaves were you planning to look at, anyway?
The Little Grill
621 N. Main Street
Harrisonburg, Virginia
(540)434-3594 |
Washington Post
vending machine
Check out the lettering
on the side!
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Outer Banks, North
Carolina
[These are couple of reports from a road trip I took
in February 2005.]
Nothing livens up a road trip like a UFO sighting. The only
problem is that this one isn't flying. It landed on the Outer
Banks of North Carolina about 30 years ago, and is slowly
rotting by the side of the road in a little town called Frisco.
Word is that it was once a hotdog stand, and most recently,
a gift shop. But now it is closed, and I couldn't even get
inside to look around.
Originally, it was designed as a vacation home by Finnish
architect Matti Suuronen in 1968. However, living in a
saucer, flying or not, did not catch on. Musician Dan Hicks
would disagree, judging from the song he wrote about what
he would do if aliens tried to abduct him:
Hell I'd go
If they came down and got me
They could be little green men
That wouldn't stop me
Buzzin' through the galaxy
Who can beat a ride for free
--Dan Hicks, from his
album Shooting Straight
Aliens in giant robot rovers! Gorillas hurling goblins out
of a volcano! Ogres riding bareback on dinosaurs! What more
could you want from a miniature golf course?
Well, it would have been nice if it had been OPEN.
That's what I get for going on a TackyQuest during the off-season
on the Outer Banks. At least I got some good pictures. |
Flying saucer in Frisco, NC
Even aliens need air conditioning...and apparently ice cream
cones, too
Galaxy Golf
Nags Head, NC
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